Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. —Rumi
I’ve always been drawn to the Eastern religions: Hinduism, Sufism, and Buddhism. I took my Buddhist lay vows 20 years ago and the Dharma has been an enormous comfort to me throughout my adult life. One of the primary teachings of the Buddha is,“No grasping. No pushing away.” It’s a practice in cultivating equanimity, the idea being that as you work towards lessening your desires and aversions, you naturally move towards the middle ground. However, I must confess: In regards to Christianity, I’ve carried a long-time aversion that has gone unchecked. In all honesty, I’ve felt that the Christian church has created a great deal of unnecessary suffering in the world, and because of that, I simply chose to ignore it.
Yet “ignore” is the root word of ignorance and I’ve come to realize that in my trying to ignore Christianity I’ve been like the ostrich sticking it’s head in a hole. If you live in the United States, as I do, you live in a culture that sprang from Christianity. Christian values and premises are entrenched in everything here, and those values have been coloring my perceptions since birth.
So I made the decision to begin to explore Christianity through creative means, with the intention to seek out my own relationship to it. Painting has always been my doorway through to understanding anything, so I connected with the Saints through my art. To the surprise of many of my liberal friends, my walls began to be covered with paintings of Christian icons. The surprise for me was that in painting these icons, I fell in love, and gained a new perspective on both Christianity and myself.
I began with Mary Magdalene and looked at seemingly endless images of her. One night as I was perusing through books, I found myself in tears. I suddenly saw in her all the women I‘ve known, who have been distorted and denied their appropriate authority by the world. My heart broke open and I found myself adoring her.
Since childhood, I’ve had an innate sense that imagery works like an incantation on the human psyche. I’ve always felt the responsibility in that. So in my painting of Magdalene, I wanted to restore her identity to the wise, empowered, and sovereign woman that I believe she was. To my surprise, as I painted her, I began to feel more empowered myself. I began to feel her presence in my life.
I am by no means a religious scholar and I have no desire to propagate my interpretations onto anyone else. However, my creative process has helped me to find balance. It’s led me towards my own voice and reorients me to the world in such a way that my soul is nourished. On a deeply personal level, it’s been transformative for me to rethink these old stories and paint them anew. I’ve come to feel both comforted and guided by the Christian Saints. I’ve begun to connect with the them as universal symbols of the Divine and I’ve experienced a deeper tenderness for humanity overall.
These icons have had millions upon millions of people praying to them. My sense is that those prayers have created a kind of current, and that as I paint them, I’ve jumped into a vast river of prayer. I’ve been swept into the hearts of Mary Magdalene, Saint Francis, Saint Hildegard, Saint Anthony, Saint Cecilia et al. A new world of ideas and inspiration has been given to me.
Image is the root of “imagination,” and as images feed our perceptions of the world, they also influence the way we move through our lives. By my own hand, I choose to create images that represent the values of respect and inclusion. In order to live in peace, I hope to continue to expand my capacity for understanding and to embrace the All through my art.
There is another saying by Rumi,“This turning towards what you love saves you.” I’ve always felt the truth in that statement and used it as central tenet in making decisions in my life. Now, as I turn towards the religion that I’ve felt so much aversion to, I’m happy to report that: turning towards what you don’t love saves you too.
I’ve always been drawn to the Eastern religions: Hinduism, Sufism, and Buddhism. I took my Buddhist lay vows 20 years ago and the Dharma has been an enormous comfort to me throughout my adult life. One of the primary teachings of the Buddha is,“No grasping. No pushing away.” It’s a practice in cultivating equanimity, the idea being that as you work towards lessening your desires and aversions, you naturally move towards the middle ground. However, I must confess: In regards to Christianity, I’ve carried a long-time aversion that has gone unchecked. In all honesty, I’ve felt that the Christian church has created a great deal of unnecessary suffering in the world, and because of that, I simply chose to ignore it.
Yet “ignore” is the root word of ignorance and I’ve come to realize that in my trying to ignore Christianity I’ve been like the ostrich sticking it’s head in a hole. If you live in the United States, as I do, you live in a culture that sprang from Christianity. Christian values and premises are entrenched in everything here, and those values have been coloring my perceptions since birth.
So I made the decision to begin to explore Christianity through creative means, with the intention to seek out my own relationship to it. Painting has always been my doorway through to understanding anything, so I connected with the Saints through my art. To the surprise of many of my liberal friends, my walls began to be covered with paintings of Christian icons. The surprise for me was that in painting these icons, I fell in love, and gained a new perspective on both Christianity and myself.
I began with Mary Magdalene and looked at seemingly endless images of her. One night as I was perusing through books, I found myself in tears. I suddenly saw in her all the women I‘ve known, who have been distorted and denied their appropriate authority by the world. My heart broke open and I found myself adoring her.
Since childhood, I’ve had an innate sense that imagery works like an incantation on the human psyche. I’ve always felt the responsibility in that. So in my painting of Magdalene, I wanted to restore her identity to the wise, empowered, and sovereign woman that I believe she was. To my surprise, as I painted her, I began to feel more empowered myself. I began to feel her presence in my life.
I am by no means a religious scholar and I have no desire to propagate my interpretations onto anyone else. However, my creative process has helped me to find balance. It’s led me towards my own voice and reorients me to the world in such a way that my soul is nourished. On a deeply personal level, it’s been transformative for me to rethink these old stories and paint them anew. I’ve come to feel both comforted and guided by the Christian Saints. I’ve begun to connect with the them as universal symbols of the Divine and I’ve experienced a deeper tenderness for humanity overall.
These icons have had millions upon millions of people praying to them. My sense is that those prayers have created a kind of current, and that as I paint them, I’ve jumped into a vast river of prayer. I’ve been swept into the hearts of Mary Magdalene, Saint Francis, Saint Hildegard, Saint Anthony, Saint Cecilia et al. A new world of ideas and inspiration has been given to me.
Image is the root of “imagination,” and as images feed our perceptions of the world, they also influence the way we move through our lives. By my own hand, I choose to create images that represent the values of respect and inclusion. In order to live in peace, I hope to continue to expand my capacity for understanding and to embrace the All through my art.
There is another saying by Rumi,“This turning towards what you love saves you.” I’ve always felt the truth in that statement and used it as central tenet in making decisions in my life. Now, as I turn towards the religion that I’ve felt so much aversion to, I’m happy to report that: turning towards what you don’t love saves you too.